The Gift of Singleness

Have you ever heard anyone tell you that being single is special? Or that it is actually a gift? Before 2016, I had never heard anyone tell me that being single was a gift. For my birthday last year, my best friend bought me a devotional that was for singles. This devotional opened my mind and challenged me to think differently about my singleness. Last year, God asked me to intentionally take some time off of dating and pursue Him fully. I decided to keep a journal and document my year of singleness, as well as do the devotional. Through this season of my life God revealed to be that being single is actually a gift. Let me explain. When you are single, the person you are serving completely, is Jesus. When you get into the season of marriage, you are not only serving Jesus, but you are also serving your spouse as well. I used to think of singleness as the absence of a relationship, rather than focusing on the relationship I already had with Jesus. I was opened to a whole new way of defining singleness, and that it could be considered something great, and something beautiful.

In my journal that I had started for my year of singleness, I decided to write down a few things that I wanted to uncover about myself in that time. I wanted to grow in my understanding of who I was in Jesus. I would take a couple days out of my week and write down a few things that had been revealed about myself. Looking back on that journal now, there were so many incredible opportunities and friends that God blessed me with, and breakthroughs that I experienced all in my year of being single. Being single was such much more rewarding than I had realized. I was looking at being single, as someone who was “lacking love” when in all actuality, I was experiencing daily, Jesus’ abundant love for me. Being single has brought me to a place in my life where I have found fulfilment by just being in God’s presence. Making the decision to be single was no easy feat. It wasn’t easy when I started and it still isn’t. There are days where I don’t see singleness as a gift and I have to remind myself of how blessed I am to be in this season of life. But, this is the season God has called me in for now, and I will spend this season fearlessly pursuing Jesus. I encourage you to do the same.

 People tend to think that if you are single, it is because you are not wanted by a man, but I have found this statement to be completely inaccurate. You are much too valuable to be with the WRONG man, and God has someone for you that you have to be patient and wait for. There could be so many different reasons as to why God has called you to a season of singleness, and I would encourage you to ask Him, and allow your heart to be open to what He is going to say. 

Maybe you are just entering this season or singleness, or maybe you have been in this season for a while, I want to encourage you that this time in your life is so special, and time you will never get back. What are you doing with your singleness? Are you enjoying every moment and giving your full attention to Jesus? Or are you waiting for this time to be over so that you can slide into the next season? God wants us to be content with Him, because He alone is enough. I understand that this season isn’t easy, especially when you are surrounded by friends who are in relationships, or even married. I know that singleness does come with struggle, but it also comes with a great reward, and that is that you get to spend uninterrupted time with your heavenly Father. So rejoice in your singleness and consider it a gift from your Father who deeply cares about you, and desires a relationship with you. 

TO DO: I would like to encourage you to start a journal and reflect on the things that God is sharing with you in this season of life that you are in. Not only that, but have an accountability partner. Grab a single girlfriend and talk to each other about the season you are both in and share your struggles, thoughts and blessings together. Get together often, and open your heart up to each other. This relationship is going to help you as you go through this season. If you don’t have a girlfriend who is single who you can go through this with, pray for one. God will provide. I prayed before I started my year of singleness, and God blessed me with my best friend. God is so faithful, and when he calls you to something, he will provide what you need in order to succeed. Trust him, and listen to his calling today. 

Romans 12:1-2 So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.” The Message Translation

Ephesians 5:18-20 “After looking at the way things are on this earth, here's what I've decided is the best way to live: Take care of yourself, have a good time, and make the most of whatever job you have for as long as God gives you life. And that's about it. That's the human lot.  Yes, we should make the most of what God gives, both the bounty and the capacity to enjoy it, accepting what's given and delighting in the work. It's God's gift! God deals out joy in the present, the now. It's useless to brood over how long we might live.” TheMSG


The Message (MSG)Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson


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WomanhoodTaylor Carr